Conversations With a Box

by MC Otto

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about

Well, after months of delays and funding issues, Conversations With a Box is finally out! This album tackles some fairly personal subject matter to me, so if you've ever wanted to sound off on people you've been at odds with, sum up the end of relationship, reminisce about heartbreak from days passed, babble semi-coherently about trees, felt triumphant, or thought that escort missions can inhale a hurricane of genitals, then I just wrote your anthem! Thanks to everyone that's supported me throughout this endeavor, and I really hope anyone/everyone/someone enjoys this album!

credits

released July 11, 2014

Lyrics and vocals by Joe Ottobre
Instrumentals from radiobeats.com, except Track 8 (Joe Ottobre) and Track 9 (info unavailable)
Production by Joe Ottobre, Joe Mobley, and 2 Mello
Mixing by 2 Mello
Recording by Joe Mobley
Additional vocals on Track 2 by Rick Farson, on Track 3 by Joe Mobley, on Track 5 by 2 Mello
Guitar Solo on Track 2 by Joe Mobley
Album Art by Vincent Ottobre
Modeling by Sean Dillon

Special thanks to my wonderful fiancee Sarah, my parents, especially my mom for supporting this crazy endeavor, my family, Vince "Evil Otto", Rick "Luscious" Farson, Joe Mobley and entire Sanctify crew, Matt Hopkins, huge ups to 2d6, without Cliff B and _stuck I'd be nowhere, Mayor Wertz, Mikal kHill for the advice, Danger Boyco, Press B, The Chad Kelson Experience, Brian Markle, Dave Rouzzo, Bunderthird, anyone else I've played with and didn't mention, everyone who pre-ordered (YOU'RE AMAZING), Jon and Emily, The Crawlspace, Tia and Bill, and anyone else I didn't mention period.

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about

MC Otto Akron, Ohio

Part man, part machine, part breakfast treat. This is probably the best way to describe Akron, Ohio's MC Otto.

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Track Name: Cold Winter (Intro)
ayo its mco, or mc otto to my frenemies
count my friends, i ain't got many of these
i can do without the people, just with plenty of amenities
i do not need the drama cuz i do not have the energy
i'm sentimentally holding on to the past
i'm going on from my last sip of the flask
i'm tippin it back, but not a drop hits the glass
closed eyes, open doors, whistling drafts
little things that I never liked about those cold days
on the quest for power,, but the mind and soul pays
come to find there's no way i'll be confined to a sole space
i could lie to the snows face and die in the cold wastes
i need something, someone, somehow to come save me
but nothing i want comes up from the haze, see
a mind can be a terrible thing if you don't use it
but so can it be too, if you choose to overdo it
bein' a captive ain't something you should confuse with
being held prisoner to a face and a tool kit
keep me locked away, i ain't one you wanna fool with
if i ever break free, hope i never lose it
Track Name: Don't Follow Me (feat Sanctify)
on my own, everything was going just fine
i was taking my time/enjoying these sights
annoyance just slight as you entered my sight
from the left or the right, they lock on to your cries
now i'm holdin your hand tryna fight for your life
alright alright, so tell me what your stuck on now
muhfuckas shootin at us, you should duck on down
but you take one to the teeth, this ai sucks god, wow
if i were the this game you'd get cussed the fuck right out


I can't breathe, we're under siege
you're life's in my hands
heed my words: don't follow me
that's the last thing I need, you don't understand it at all

i should get paid to baby sit this little kid
but this idiot that im livid with is crippled with
being a fetishist for gettin hit and killed and shit
and huggin every motherfucker in infected villages
i wish you were elizabeth, you could handle your self
and maybe even try to dig up a bit of ammo and health
like, shotgun shells? i'm thinkin' damn those would help
but no you found a puddle and got strangled with kelp
why does every zombie game feel that it needs a section
to try a human connection, i'm losing my effin
patience with these npcs that walk into trip mines
to the point where i do it on purpose while screamin "bitch, die!!!"


I can't breathe, we're under siege
you're life's in my hands
heed my words: don't follow me
that's the last thing I need, you don't understand it at all
Track Name: Off
all my life i been fightin for a lil recoginition just a little pat on the head or a simple admission that i'm on the right path or on track for the distance, it all seems so easy but it simply isn't, i was hardly ambitious and it was met with derision so i ran outta gas when i should have been driven, i should have had visions of college tuition, physician's and women, developing interest, instead i became a musician that's when the world started spinning and everyone around me made my life their business, don't be a rock star thats fiction how bout a doctor that's fixin peoples limbs that are missing or learn to rip a transmission, i'm on the road to perdition and i don't even give a damn anymore, i got some free tickets so i'm plannin a family tour

GET IT OFF YOUR CHEST

to all my fake friends i didn't turn my back on shit, lest you forget that i have my own life to live, instead y'all went off all cryin like some whiny ass kids, bout how ya life sucks, well i guess that's what ya whiny ass gets, shouldn't you grow up? you better bet your ass i did, if you got thrown out, you didn't get the facts i did, you trashed my whole house, and stuck we with the bills we split, i wish it didn't go down like it did, i admit, i wasn't really ready to have buddies with bassinets, be lockin my cabinets, preparing for accidents, i should have been adamant bout all that i'd had it with, but ever the advocate your conditions were adequate, now i sound like an analyst who is reachin out to his management, y'all feelin abandonment over your legal inhabitance, look, i know the situation sucks, but you guys need to ante up about 1400 bucks (damn)

GET IT OFF YOUR CHEST

i know i sound angry like i'm burning with rage but i'm really just venting and then turning the page, i know you guys are proud now that i'm earning my way and every single person out there makes some earnest mistakes, that said, i'm going back to warcraft for the rest of the day, or till most of my hair falls out and the rest of it's grey, who needs gas or water, electricity's paid, and i think the fact y'all miss me so much is fuckin' great,
Track Name: Conversations With a Box
takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown
well the way things are going my jaw should be musclebound
seriously, i bet if shit's fucked up now i should cash in all my chips
and suddenly double down
i walk on crumbled ground, not afraid to say i'm in a dark place
like helen keller in space or some variety of cart race
constantly with the heart ache, smiles that really are fake
at the end of a hard day, or losing my shit in a hallway
i'll say, at least i won't make more demons
i have all the more reason at least to stay breathin
i can bottle up this anger and leave it in safe keeping
and be ready to talk about it at length in eight seasons
i won't ever try to repeat the mistakes of my dad
my life won't leave a bottle in it's place when i'm sad
that's not a dig, hell he knows i promised him that
and i am not exaggerating, this is honestly fact

(somedays we're a bit lost
and it seems that we've bit off
a little more than we can chew
and it's all that we can do
and i know that you're confused
but when the music hits stop
i'm just another guy conversing with a box)

i don't even classify as sort of tongue in cheek
i was born to stuff the beats with fucked up frees
show up at an open mic like once a week
and score a couple drinks or at least something free
oh who'm i kiddin not like i ever leave the residence
impressive since i've held a job and settled shit
with people who need evidence of causes that i'll rebel with
screamin on mic like i forgot i'm not a metal kid
at least not anymore, i could pick up a guitar but i forgot every chord
i couldn't write ffl if i wasn't incredibly bored
i look back on all these rivers that i never did fjord
but am i being literal, metaphorical or...
look, once a week i have an existential crisis
what's nice is at least i can predict when it arises
what sucks is the snub, the complete and utter silence
of the little voice inside that tells me to keep smilin'

(somedays we're a bit lost
and it seems that we've bit off
a little more than we can chew
and it's all that we can do
and i know that you're confused
but when the music hits stop
i'm just another guy conversing with a box)

no matter the month i can only seem to sleep when it's cold
like there's a freezer atop my blanket and furnace below
if i could earnestly show any of the hurt in my flow
i certainly know some folks who'd be searchin' they souls
me? don't even bother and don't bother me either
this is not a cry for help, it's a hollow defeat chirp
arising from this dragon that has swallowed me feet first
i'm only weighing him down, man, see his powerful knees hurt
i don't bend, i think i only buckle and break
like a car crash, safe and only my knuckles seem scraped
it's entirely possible that this is psychosematic
nice, though, to have it like those who enact it
on programs with baggage, i got a honey-do shitlist
of issues that i can't fix in just 22 minutes
i need no commercial interruption just to run to the finish
and lose it all then, when i'm coming to get it

(somedays we're a bit lost
and it seems that we've bit off
a little more than we can chew
and it's all that we can do
and i know that you're confused
but when the music hits stop
i'm just another guy conversing with a box)

i feel bad complaining when i know that it's gets better
i know we'll get past the weather and be a family together
i guess there's just a lot that i don't really wanna process
i can't put it through it's paces and expect to come out lossless
and i really do apologize for all my recent crossness
but i come by it honest, and it don't matter what i wanted
cuz frankly, that much should be obvious to anyone/with a brain and two ears and a pc with a pentium
what's time's return policy, I'm sendin' em
a grieviance for a couple bad weeks with notes for reference
i'm at my end and such, and the problems just get bigger yet
a few years ago, i'd settle down with a cigarette
and right bout now you damn right that i'm missing that
but i'm tryin not to make my ladytype all pissed and crap
i should be glad that i got a coping mechanism
this dope mess i'm spittin', i'd be a total wreck if i didn't
Track Name: Wrong Turn (feat 2 Mello)
another late night, park the car in the drive
gettin ready for the fight of my life, man fuck my life
apparently i'm all fuckin covers and lies
so this is where love goes when trust rolls over and dies
so there i sit, lights off but the cars running
it got the right idea, maybe it's on to something
maybe i should turn around and just leave this city
but she knows i'm here, can you believe this shit she...
puts me through. puts me through? I can't play the victim
i'm just as guilty in all this as she is, who we shittin'?
we moved too fast, too young, cuz i wouldn't listen
too bad i'm stuck cuz my wallets in the stupid kitchen
all this stupid bitchin, she won't hear me through,
she says that i don't either, that much is clearly true
i got a lump in my throat the size of indiana
jones but i know it's time to open the door and man up

i musta taken a wrong turn, a wrong turn x2
i wonder as i wander, do i want her?
or do i want her cuz deep down I want hurt?
i musta taken a wrong turn, a wrong turn x2
i can't go down this one way road much longer
but how am i supposed to find a way out if i don't get lost first?

i'm at the door, i wait a sec expectantly
then turn my key, like i don't know she's expecting me
to come home with some lipstick on my neck and cheek
she been suspecting me to be a cheat for at least three weeks
me! really! just because i come home 3 hours after work
i don't answer my phone and smell like weed afterwards?
i'd tell her really, but she'd call me a bastard first
then a lyin sack of shit 'n say she couldn't ask for worse
(well that's exactly what she got even though it ain't right
she was wrong about me and I was wrong about like
500 things that I told her that night, I didn't lie
it just felt like my life wasn't mine
she wanted answers, but the shit i said next
is a phrase i still resent ever leaving my chest
i'm suprised she didn't try to beat me to death
when i told her i could see the reasons her ex left)

i musta taken a wrong turn, a wrong turn x2
i wonder as i wander, do i want her?
or do i want her cuz deep down I want hurt?
i musta taken a wrong turn, a wrong turn x2
i can't go down this one way road much longer
but how am i supposed to find a way out if i don't get lost first?
Track Name: The Note
from a blind date with just names to trading "hi's" on myspace, to writing songs in five eight with smiles all on our face, from a goodnite kiss to the your place or my place? sittin by a fire place admiring acquired tastes, tiring of this trial phase, unfazed by my tries to play, or so i thought, cuz i ain't seen you in like five days, called to apologize saw the errors in my ways, when you finally picked up you didn't say hi the same, you started to cry a name, and then you hung up with a violent clang, when i called back you told me never to call again, and then i was so lost i got my ball point pen, left a note on you door saying if not now then when, i thought that this was were our road began, i'm okay with just laughing as i hold your hand, i shouldn't rush nothin' just lemme be your man, but when your dad came out with the gun i ran, now i've lost track of the sundowns since i last came around that house with a rundown fence it was never explained to me in a way that made sense, talked to a few of your friends, referred to you in the past tense, sayin how weird i am but never attesting to your abscence, i can't stand this, how our love was transient, just a fleeting moment that is never again happening, it's time to pack it in, i guess i gotta move on, don't wanna let go but this is what i figured you want, so i left and set off to find a new haunt, picking up the pieces of you and me leftover from these loose thoughts

few years later i came back with another note, put it on your door if you got it i'll never know, maybe you discarded all my hopes, but i put my soul into them words so i hope you read what i wrote:
i think of you when i hear our time signature, i think it's true i might not be a good listener, if i saw you right now you would be a welcome visitor, i'm insecure insofar as i am singular, here are my integers, call em if ya need em, get in touch with someone you left beaten and defeated, if you would've let me i'd be everything you needed, but i guess you got away so this is mission: incompleted
Track Name: What!?
i told em to turn on the lights in the forest
they didnt' know what it meant so they then just ignored it
and sat around and heckled me in the darkness from their porches
of course this is before i poisoned em all with orchids
imagine if i had forced it or referred to a killer instinct
or imagine instead i'd put out a million brilliant things
imagine if i cared that everyone didn't get it
i do it all the time, cynically my worst critic
is myself, and nobody else
is gonna get it done for me, show love for me when i need some help
I'm meaning well, though it's easy to misconstrew
exactly what it is that i been meanin to do
the pressure is mounting i guess i should display some effort
and it'll be the first and the last time that i give an f word
fuck it, there, that's now yours to keep
i'm really invested in methods of testing of counting the sheep
impressive, i'm guessing the message is i'm walking through sleep
i'm mired in tiredness tryin shit to get me less wired at least
i've taken nyquil, benadryl, and a couple of melatonin
my eyes ain't closin cuz i don't think that i plugged my phone in
groanin like a zombie you'd bring in Mikal to KHill
just lemme finish up fixin the typos in my will
i'm gettin a little ahead myself, i mean you can sleep when your dead
i'm bettin a veteran peddlin better things had you misled
every line on paper designed to sound better in head
was i ever an english major or am I a caveman instead?
Otto crush with club, not bang with out rocks
not hang with all jocks, dang, they all talk
My boss had heard me rap and I figured I'd walk
But she thought it was dope and I got off without scott
i got this far in life on my own without god
cuz if it's proven otherwise then I'm a devout fraud
i got remote odds, on what's pertaining to my victory
a long shot, but blistered feet won't hinder me
an injury simply isn't forbidding me rippin the inquiries really it's simple, see, used to be pimply now i pimp triplets evicted from misery cuz i lacked company, run from me, underneath any and everything, petty endeavors never successfully managed to make it in music or anything that i attemped and it didn't make sense to me
What? I still don't give a fuck
If'd you'd believed otherwise, the fuck can be used to shut up
Track Name: Ottomatic
never been ghetto but i'm a poverty hustler, only lowered suspension on the car is the muffler, that's how the spark's lit if i park it on your carpet not finna find me at the market finna find me at a target, lark shit snitches singin but this shit is for the birds, then they wanna milk cash cows and roll with the herd, it's simply absurd but it's all simply words, if you wanna roll em together you oughta learn, (learn what?) Nothing, you ain't reinventin the wheel so keep frontin, see something you may wanna do is invest in better soundbytes instead biting style from others you think you sound like, i'm wound tight and stressed dressed up to catch the flak and i just might snap your back like my snapback hat, get ya act right cat cuz i'm comin hard like bane in knightfall tearin up the track like it was made from drywall, bitches do not answer the phone whenever i call, somehow they ain't never home and this is my fault? and i'm like, wait... really? musta took a bump to the head, y'all actin silly, from detroit to philly nah i don't like your sports teams haven't since i was fourteen i been havin more dreams, esp or espn yeah i have foreseen hella roars and screams the pens playing more queen

i wanna go to where everybody knows my name, and that's home that's the best kind of fame
i wanna go to where everybody loves me, and i can be full of myself and stay hungry
i wanna go to where i'm keepin all my magic
i wanna go to where i'm hangin up my jacket/ but i gotta keep goin because this life is otto-matic

rather work smart than hard and that's my issue, as i try to restart the car don't give a shit who warned me to avoid my own hubris it's useless and stupid like my ride can't move it, stuck on the side of the road waitin for triple a i wouldn't give a shit if they towed my vehicle away and left me a brand new chevrolet, cuz my brain took an LOA, that's to say i might be out my mind, not really crazy but something that i left behind, it's adventure time i only wish this wasn't real life, i try to play it off but somedays i feel real strife, feel the slice of the knife as i roll the dice for your wife she ain't gonna make it better turn off the lights, it was real nice to be invited to game night we oughta do it again next week, same time, (seriously we just mixed dnd and clue, you didn't really think i killed some now did you?)

i wanna go to where everybody knows my name, and that's home that's the best kind of fame
i wanna go to where everybody loves me, and i can be full of myself and stay hungry
i wanna go to where i'm keepin all my magic
i wanna go to where i'm hangin up my jacket/ but i gotta keep goin because this life is otto-matic

i'll meet your bad additude with a double dose of apathy, everyword that comes out ya mouth is left to atrophy, reabsorb into the time stream good luck trying to find me today i'm living my dream day dreamin something unlikely, if you tryna see me i suggest you get some glasses, spend some time at the annex take a few classes, it's dangerous to go alone here you oughta have this 8 by 10 glossy that says "fuck you signed Otto-matic", ... cut you out my life if you bring that negativity you kiddin b? you the one who gon' be missin' me, i don't need this kinda thing messin up my symmetry, the beauty is that my ability is still in it's infancy, fluidity expanding to show my viability, my verbal agility is only matched by your emotional salinity, y'all fuckin killin me i am what i am cuz i have the will to be

i wanna go to where everybody knows my name, and that's home that's the best kind of fame
i wanna go to where everybody loves me, and i can be full of myself and stay hungry
i wanna go to where i'm keepin all my magic
i wanna go to where i'm hangin up my jacket/ but i gotta keep goin because this life is otto-matic
Track Name: tms
sometimes you gotta fall down just to climb to the top
sometimes you go blind to find out what you've got
well now it's my time and i'm taking my shot
sometimes you lose a battle that you never fought
and back to win later because whoever thought
that this would be my time so i'm taking my shot

i've spent years diggin, days designing, months thinking, weeks reminding me nights that i should stop drinking, with these angel all around me i should probably stop blinking, and i've been at it so long the fat lady stopped singing, my ears haven't stopped ringing like the sound of a cash drawer, flash more memories of mine than I am ready to crash for, i ain't here to do nothing cept for settle a bad score, if you got some bad blood then what the fuck's a tad more

every step i take seems to leave another smashed floor, but when the dust settles i guess this is what i asked for, i'm not afraid to burn bridges if this is my shot and i miss it only got myself to blame whether it's a mile or inches, i can be vile and vicious with a violent disposition or chartiable and gracious towards the human condition but if you try to step between myself and my mission, you'll be someone that i used to know that was formery living

the thing that kills the spark is a lack of motivation, i'm back and forth debatin bout packin up my playthings, and making, the changes that i need to succeed, but not get too conceited so i'm free to believe that somewhere out there there is someone better than me, so i gotta keep driven to find my rival to beat, i trek like fivel through heat, go west and find out i need to grow a dream from a seed, and not bring the tree with me cuz it kills the leaves

one shot red dot got me reaching for the diazepam, better not let em drop cuz i'm shakin four or five in hand, never caught steady thoughts in the mind of a snipers plan but this ain't metal gear solid i can't pause to reach the promised land, i'm an honest man living virtually realistic, i'll search for you in a minute but right now i need to finish this fight from the beginning because you broke my concentration, now i'm out of the enemy base and back in front of the playstation

sometimes you gotta fall down just to climb to the top
sometimes you go blind to find out what you've got
well now it's my time and i'm taking my shot
sometimes you lose a battle that you never fought
and back to win later because whoever thought
that this would be my time so i'm taking my shot

but if i try and i fail then was it time wasted? perish the thought, cuz even if i don't make it, it's clear that i got closer to the places that i wanna go, just gotta figure out where the gate is, if success don't like it when i knock then i gotta break in, plant my flag into the pavement of glory that i'll partake in, shakin down the dream til it allows me to make my way in and blow the door with more c4 than in fiona's basement

sometimes you gotta fall down just to climb to the top
sometimes you go blind to find out what you've got
well now it's my time and i'm taking my shot
sometimes you lose a battle that you never fought
and back to win later because whoever thought
that this would be my time so i'm taking my shot
---
OH
OH OH
OHHHHHOOOOOOH
OHHHH OH.